Poohd Thai mai?

Not too long ago I asked for a room-temperature bottle of water at the school coffee shop. The lady that was helping me grabbed one and brought it to me. I was perplexed. For the very first time I had said something somewhat complex in Thai and I had not gotten the puzzled stare or the sympathetic smile. 

Not that the phrase was that complex. A room-temperature bottle of water in Thai is translated as “not cold water”. Still, I felt proud of myself because, after a year living in Thailand, something I said sounded Thai. The Thais are very picky about their language and they do not understand what you are saying unless you pronounce it correctly.

I would like to think that the reason why my Thai language skills are so reduced after living in Thailand for over a year is that the sounds are impossible. To make things worse, Thai language has five tones. A word that sounds somewhat like “maa” could mean horse, dog or (to) come, depending on the tone. Imagine how fun it sounds to call a horse or a dog.

In any case, I would like to list a few things I learned so that I do not completely loose them when I move out of Thailand.

Sawasdee ka (it sounds more like “sabadee”, really), sabai dee mai ka?

Sabai dee ka, kawp Kuhn ka. Lae khun sabai dee mai ka?

Sabai dee ka, kawp khun ka.

A polite exchange of good mornings (or afternoon or evenings), how are yous and thank yous.

Kaw… kaho pad pak (for example) = I would like vegetable fried rice. Kaw is a polite way to ask, even though it means “I want”.

Gin ahaan jet = I eat vegetarian food. This phrase caused me some trouble. At a restaurant I thought I said this and they brought me duck. Then I started saying I wanted ahaan mai moo, mai gai, mai ped, mai plaah, mai taleh (food with no pork, no chicken, no duck, no fish and no seafood). It is a long request, but they get this.

The funniest to me was naam khiao (literally, green water), name of the chlorophyll water that I found at vegetarian restaurant. (In the same way, blood is naam daeng = red water)

Gin khao loleo = did you have lunch/dinner? (Literally, did you eat rice?)

Chai = yes or mai chai = no (no yes)

Arai na = Come again? Pardon? (A totally useless phrase, since I was not going to understand no matter how many times they repeated something)

Mai koh chai = I do not understand (admitting defeat)

Bpai tee nai = where do you go? (The Thais love to ask where you are going)

Bpai tale/dataang/ron riahn = I go to the beach/market/school.

Khun cheu arai ka = what is your name?

Chan cheu Florencia ka

Khun maa jaa arai ka = where are you from?

Maa jaa prateh Argentina ka

Bpai drot. Kuae meau/sai meau = Go straight. Turn right/left (my wonderful directions to the moto-taxi drivers)

Khun chob ponlamaii teesud arai ka = what is your favorite fruit?

Chan chob mamuang teesud ka (mango). Mai chob dturian (durian is disgusting!)

Sway mak = very beautiful

Dee mak = Very good

Rak = to love. I never had to use this word…

Mai bpen rai = you are welcome! Or no worries! Or it doesn’t f*** matter!

As I write this, I realize I learned most of my Thai in my first two weeks in Thailand, while taking Thai classes. It seems  that nothing that Teacher Ni taught the kids in many hours while I was in the classroom filtered in my brain (except for the simple commands: niap niap = quiet!; naang long = sit down; dtron = straight; kian = write; fang = listen). Neither did I learn anything from Thai friends, since I had none. 

I still feel proud of myself for that water bottle. If I had to survive with no English speakers around, I am sure my Thai would be really good. Na ka?